A Brick Is Just a Brick

You know what fucking annoys me? I get really annoyed by the tendency for people to have discussions about or make statements involving non-tangibles. For instance, when people say things like, "Oh, pray for my mom, she has cancer. Keep her in your thoughts," or, "I'm a Leo, and because of that, I'm strong-willed and outgoing." Recent twat post I read said, "Nurture strength of spirit 2 shield u n sudden misfortune. Do not distress urself w dark imagining. Many fears r born of fatigue&loneliness." Seriously? Let's analyze that post, aside from the blatantly obvious, this post clearly wasn't written by a person grounded in the realm of the intelligent.

First, "Nurture strength of spirit to shield you from sudden misfortune"
Ok, now I'm wondering, were it that we had some sort of "spirit", how in the FUCK would we nurture something we... oh, I don't know, CAN'T SEE??? Not to mention the fact that we are nurturing a specific aspect of said spirit. Just read this conversation for an example:


"Hey, Chris, what are you doing today?"
"Oh, not much, Ted. I'm just going to be nurturing the strength of my spirit by conjuring positive imagery from my dreamspace."
"Hmm, that's interesting. I was just going to shit in a prostitute's mouth, but that sounds way more fun."

If you ever told me, person to person, that you were nurturing your spirit, I'd kick you in the face. You might as well say that your facilitating the transmission of your soul waves, or that you're measuring your operating thetans with your new e-meter, you daffy fuck.
Now, in this excerpt, we are led to believe that if we nurture our spirit, this will in turn protect us from "sudden misfortune". Exactly what would YOU define to be SUDDEN? MISFORTUNE? To me, sudden misfortune would be something like, maybe a hurricane blows my fucking house down. Perhaps, someone robs me at gunpoint and then decides to shoot me for my seventeen dollars and my scuffed Nike shoes. Maybe, since the flake who wrote this is from California, the earth decides to take a giant shit on her and rain down a mudslide/forest fire/earthquake orgy of death. Well, I guess if that stuff happens, you just didn't harvest your wishing tree enough. Oh, I mean you didn't nurture the strength of your spirit.

Two,"Do not distress yourself with dark imagining."

Ok, don't imagine dark things, because you might stress yourself out? That's fucking dodo talk. Obviously, you shouldn't spend your day fantasizing about chaos, carnage and mayhem. You might turn into the Joker, and we all know what happened to that guy. Chances are, if you spend your waking hours dreaming about cutting people's faces off, the last thing you need is some new-age hippie telling you not to do it. I doubt a 140 character tweet is going to provide you with the solutions you need to "find your center", what ever the fuck that means. Talking in language like this is equivalent to telling someone not to look at the sun because it will hurt their eyes. No shit. You'll find that almost every pseudoscience out there, from horoscopes to tarot, uses language like this. It's vague and it applies to everyone. That's why you identify with it.

Three,"Many fears are born of fatigue and loneliness."

What the fuck does that even mean? Many fears. Tired and lonely. Scared because I'm tired and nobody will fuck me? What the shit does that mean? Let's rope it in, Moonbeam? I went and read some of the other brilliant twats by this person, and they are all filled with the same dime-store, hackneyed, flaccid and generally worthless attempts to provide some sort of positive reinforcement. People that talk like this and think like this make me want to shit on their magic rocks, and vomit on their individual books of Warmth and Vibration.

This type of thinking is rampant in our culture. People admonish various religions in this country for how outlandish and silly they are (see also; Scientology, Mormonism, etc.), but have no problem with the concept that stars, spirits, vibrations, angels or any other arbitrary nonsense could possibly effect their lives. Seriously, what ever happened to logic? If people took a second to listen to the crazy shit that came out of them, maybe they'd realize that they are just as fucking silly as all those people who believe they will rule their own planet as a living god some day.

"Even a brick wants to be something... Aspire. Anything common and ordinary has the potential to be brilliant!!!"

No, dummy, a brick is a brick. It's a rock. It doesn't want to be anything because it doesn't have a brain. Clearly, neither do you.